No purpose.
All I wished is a long process of depression,
heart threatening and insane.
Tears, tears, my fragile body can't express this pain.
I look at this food; the face of evil, so tempting.
But I allow myself to starve i.e. self relieving.
Because, yes, it feels so pleasing.
It's so sad it hurts so much but I can't get out.
I call your name, I scream and shout,
wrap your arms around me, around all that's left.
I'm sorry this is happening, I know it's such a mess.
Sit up, after sit up, run after run,
because I feel the need to.
I break down mentally, and collapse physically.
Death row is a border line.
The price I pay for what I want to be.
Food-I don't touch, I waste myself away.
Your all going to have to watch.
Because yes you should pay.
It's your turn to cry for me.
Fear the smell of food when near.
Don't breathe the vile calorie packed tracks in
my mind deprived it's you I'm needing.
This self hatred is a hunger, one that I am feeding.
Isomnia, this barely breathing body is awake.
Researching every detail to every food.
Untill my eyes close and the my life is at stake.
The enemy appears in my dreams.
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good description and imagery in this piece
ReplyDeleteits very effective and captures the readers interest
you are on a roll today. :D
ReplyDeletebut seriously, your writing is really vivid and authentic. i actually felt like it was me who was throwing up, trying so hard to 'stay thin', being overwhelmed and desperate. you touched on all of these emotions. play around with punctuation maybe, but in terms of the actual writing, i really enjoyed this piece! (or should i say i was rather disgusted by this?:P)
in any case,
well done!